LEAGUE OF SCUMBAG GENTLEMEN
The day after that phone message i started writing songs in ernest. I know this because at the time i kept a timeline journal of this particular period in my life. I quote:
"...hope this resolve (for her) to be single will release us from the bullshit. Wait for phone call. Begin writing songs in ernest." Two weeks went by with no word. I didn't want to push her and wanted to give her space to deal with Jeeves. After one particularly bad night I crack and leave a message on her cell. The call is not returned. Send letter and casette of new songs in the mail. No response.
A week later and I'm falling apart. I begin to worry that maybe something went awry. All the talk of Voodoo hitmen, 666 labia tattoos and Jeeves' nasty streak start to sink in again. She could be hurt....or worse. I start tripping. i leave a flurry of anguished messages on her cell and still get no response. Finally I can't take it anymore. I call the home phone. Jeeves answers.
"Hellooo." There's that accent. I try to stay calm and ask to talk to Friendly.
"You have a lot of gall calling my house. I thought she told you she didn't want to talk to you again?" I bite my lip and ask if she's OK?
"Of course. We are better than ever. We've been at the beach.....discussing you as a matter of fact." The guy is so full of himself i can't stand it. The calm vanishes. I let go with both barrels, laying out the entire affair.
"Well." he says, as i take a breath. "I hope you feel better. You certainly are no gentleman."
I say i love his wife and......He snickers and tells me to disappear. I tell him if she tells me too, I will. He gloats at my heartbreak. Guess I can't blame him.
"I'll have her call you." he sneers, and hangs up.
When friendly finally calls she sounds blase' and disaffected by the whole thing. She tells me she decided two weeks ago to go back to Jeeves and couldn't face telling me. She hoped i would get the hint. She sounds high. In a monotone she says "You must have known this could end badly." I flip and tell her i never want to see her again. I almost got my wish.
"...hope this resolve (for her) to be single will release us from the bullshit. Wait for phone call. Begin writing songs in ernest." Two weeks went by with no word. I didn't want to push her and wanted to give her space to deal with Jeeves. After one particularly bad night I crack and leave a message on her cell. The call is not returned. Send letter and casette of new songs in the mail. No response.
A week later and I'm falling apart. I begin to worry that maybe something went awry. All the talk of Voodoo hitmen, 666 labia tattoos and Jeeves' nasty streak start to sink in again. She could be hurt....or worse. I start tripping. i leave a flurry of anguished messages on her cell and still get no response. Finally I can't take it anymore. I call the home phone. Jeeves answers.
"Hellooo." There's that accent. I try to stay calm and ask to talk to Friendly.
"You have a lot of gall calling my house. I thought she told you she didn't want to talk to you again?" I bite my lip and ask if she's OK?
"Of course. We are better than ever. We've been at the beach.....discussing you as a matter of fact." The guy is so full of himself i can't stand it. The calm vanishes. I let go with both barrels, laying out the entire affair.
"Well." he says, as i take a breath. "I hope you feel better. You certainly are no gentleman."
I say i love his wife and......He snickers and tells me to disappear. I tell him if she tells me too, I will. He gloats at my heartbreak. Guess I can't blame him.
"I'll have her call you." he sneers, and hangs up.
When friendly finally calls she sounds blase' and disaffected by the whole thing. She tells me she decided two weeks ago to go back to Jeeves and couldn't face telling me. She hoped i would get the hint. She sounds high. In a monotone she says "You must have known this could end badly." I flip and tell her i never want to see her again. I almost got my wish.
posted by mike osterhout at 8:23 AM
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