"NEVER TRUST A JUNKIE"

In April Y2K1 I was invited to lecture at SFAI. Over the years i had come and gone with little teaching gigs and in-class talks, but this was the first time I had been asked to do a formal lecture in the school auditorium. It even paid a thousand dollars. I was taking this one seriously. Just before I was to go, Jeeves took off to London with some Haitian Santera (who happened to live downstairs), to do a lecture of his own on American/Haitian/Brit Voodoo. With hubby out of the country Friendly caught the bus up to the Catskills for a little groin time. She was pale and skinny and recently had plastic surgery to remove some bags under her eyes and a varicous vein. But it wasn't her look that concerned me. She had this idea that the downstairs Santera had hired a hitman to kill her so he could get Jeeves'money. He had recently won some lawsuit (with the help of some black magic mumbo jumbo). It would all be laughable if it wasn't true.
As soon as she pulled into town Jeeves tracked her down and a big scene ensued via cell phone. She wanted me to take her back to the bus. I told her to call a cab. After numerous trips to the bathroom she calmed down. It was becoming obvious Jeeves hadn't known all this time about our affair and when he found out those gold teeth started to grind. I had a plane to catch. By the time i got to SF I was sick as a dog. I'd caught some flu and couldn't get out of bed. I told El Prof. about Friendly's voodoo concerns and he raised his eyebrows. "Don't discount that shit." he warned. That wasn't what i wanted to hear. Somehow I pulled it together enough to deliver my lecture called "Cultural Iconoclasticism", mentioning the Taliban's destruction of Afganistan's ancient Buddhas, International terrorism and my animal killing artwork in parallel. I was too sick to enjoy the positive response.
Once back in NYC, I crashed on Chuck's couch and immediately called Friendly. She now seemed fine, bubbly even. Something wasn't right. Then she dropped the bomb. She had been strung out on dope for some time and now she was facing it. I had to be patient. I was completely oblivious. It wasn't just the heroin use that bugged me. It was the sneaky lieing bullshit that got to me. Why not share? When i told Chuck all this he asked if she could get him some. He was no help. When I pressed the issue of her lieing to me she just shrugged her shoulders and declared- "Never trust a junkie." Somehow I think she thought it was my fault for not catching her. Boy, was I stupid.