THE RISE OF THE CELEBUSLUT

Karen Black, the lead singer for the band (not the actress), coined the term "minor cultural icon" ; referring to herself. Her husband Sammy Morita came up with "Availabist", meaning anyone who would show up and do almost anything at a moment's notice....usually at church. Before Bijou Phillips or her little sister- in- legz Paris Hilton, even had enough growth down there to put razor to their peach fuzzed pumices, Dr. Stripper, Karen, Friendly and NYC grrrls like them were working poles at The Babydoll, and Billy's, crapping on rich Frenchmen in tacky dungeons, and playing sexy dress up at their day jobs. These weren't your run of the mill, single mom, just trying to get by, exotic. No, these young ladies were on the tip of the so-called Sex Industry- babes with bods and brains, who had all the power. Forget a purse containing The Star or People magazine. More often than not, their pretty noses would be buried in The Story of O or some heavy tome written by Deluze and Guatarri on coffee break. "What do you think of this footnote? Hand me that eyeliner, sweetie. We're just like coal miners, aren't we?"
Like most men in my position, i didn't mind DS working as a stripper..... when we first got together. I was cool with it. I admited if i were a good looking young female i probably would've gone that route also. It was relatively easy, and you came off shift with a pile of cash. It sure beat carpentry. So what if you had to grind your privates into some creepy 50 year old's tented lap? This all changed one night when I went down to The 'doll to pick up DS after work. I was a bit early, so went in to have a beer. That's when I realized just how square I really was. The Doctor was still in the operating room, attempting a tricky 50 dollar bill extraction from a very sick patient. HEY MOTHERFUCKER! THAT'S MY GIRLFRIEND WORKING YOUR JOINT! DS turned, waved and rolled her eyes, as if to say- I'll just be a second, honey. Just got to finsih this one thing.
To my credit, I was chill. I knew kicking up a fuss would get me nowhere, so i swallowed it until later. Then, when i finally broached the subject, to my surprise the Doctor was agreeable. If it really bothered me, well, she could get a waitress job or maybe be a checkout girl....."Don't worry baby. I'll quit if that's what you want." she assured me, batting those big fake eyelashes and showing me her new belly button piercing. "You're more important to me than any stupid old stripper job." I lapped it up. Boy, was I gullible. OK. How about a lap dance?